Some Like it Hot (Sleep, that is)

Hot Babyby Valerie Plowman from www.babywisemom.com.

My children amuse me. I know everyone is amused by their own children. Children are like most people–incredibly quirky. My children are no different, and I find quirks both fascinating and amusing.

Brayden does not mind being cold. He is bewildered when his friends want to go inside after playing in the snow for two hours. Even as a pre-toddler, he did not want to wear a coat out in the brisk fall weather. He just doesn’t mind it.

Kaitlyn does not like to be cold. Unless incredible fun is happening, she is done in the snow after 30 minutes. She especially does not like to have wind blowing on her. Spring is not a fun time due to the wind issues.

McKenna is like Brayden–she does not mind the cold. She will play outside in the snow forever. Brayden is lucky to have her.

That isn’t the quirky part. Here comes the quirky part.

Brayden (6 years old) does not like to be cold when he sleeps. He currently sleeps in a sweatshirt, flannel pajama bottoms, and socks. He wears a child-sized snuggie that his grandmother gave him for Christmas. Then he has his sheet, a comforter, a heavy afaghan, his baby quilt I made him, two fleece blankets, and a couple small cotton blankets thrown on top. His room is kept at 70 degrees. Not kidding.

Kaitlyn (4 years old) loves to be cold when she sleeps. She has the coldest bedroom in the house. She currently sleeps in a flimsy nightgown meant for warm summer nights and hates to sleep in socks. She sleeps with a sheet, comforter, and a couple of fleece blankets because I think she must be freezing, not because she wants them.

McKenna (2 years old) also does not like to be cold when she sleeps. She sleeps in warm pajamas and socks. She has the warmest bedroom in the house. She has more blankets than I can count and she knows if I try to remove some. And she knows which ones I have removed. If she wakes from a nap and had bare arms (because she took off her cardigan because she was “too hot” during playtime), she wakes up crying.

See? They are quirky.

I share these quirks to illustrate that some children like to be warm when they sleep and others like to be on the cooler side. ALSO, it takes some observation to know what they each like–it isn’t always what you might assume.

How Do You Know?
I know this is an annoying answer for some people, but for me, I just knew. I could tell Brayden liked to sleep warmer as a baby. When Kaitlyn came along, I quickly figured out she liked to be cooler (and I got many lectures from certain relatives about her lack of socks–she hated socks as a four week old and still hates socks as a four year old and I feel so vindicated as a mother!).

The best advice I can give you is to pay attention. You need to notice patterns. You might need to take notes to see these patterns, or you might be able to track it in your head. What did your child wear to sleep in? What blankets, if any, were involved? What was the temperature in the room?

And with that information, how did your child sleep that night?

What Temperature is Best?
It seems most sleep experts agree somewhere between 65-70 degrees is best (though some go as low as 60 and high as 75). That really is a wide range, though. 60 feels very differently than 75. How do you tell what is best for your individual child? Once again, this is where the power of observation comes into play. You have your range to work with, now experiment and see what works best.

Why is temperature so important?

“Experts agree the temperature of your sleeping area and how comfortable you feel in it affect how well and how long you snooze. Why? “When you go to sleep, your set point for body temperature — the temperature your brain is trying to achieve — goes down,” says H. Craig Heller, PhD, professor of biology at Stanford University, who wrote a chapter on temperature and sleep for a medical textbook. “Think of it as the internal thermostat.” If it’s too cold, as in Roy’s case, or too hot, the body struggles to achieve this set point.

That mild drop in body temperature induces sleep. Generally, Heller says, “if you are in a cooler [rather than too-warm] room, it is easier for that to happen.” But if the room becomes uncomfortably hot or cold, you are more likely to wake up, says Ralph Downey III, PhD, chief of sleep medicine at Loma Linda University…” (source)

Finding the perfect temperature gets tricky with the more people you add to the family.

I recommend you figure out what the lowest temperature needs to be. So in our family, my husband and Kaitlyn like to sleep in a cooler environment. So the thermostat is set to a cooler temperature for those two. Even in the winter, my husband sleeps with only a sheet and a light blanket. No socks.

Then the rest of us warm sleepers adjust our environment as needed. We all wear warmer PJs and all wear socks in the winter. We all have our layers of blankets. The children have space heaters in their rooms that have a thermostat.

So in your quest for good sleep in your family, do not underestimate the importance of temperature, pajamas, and blankets. It is a vital element in getting peaceful, continuous sleep. What is perfect for you will not automatically be perfect for anyone else in the home. Work to figure out the ideal for each person and figure out how to achieve that in your home. You will all be sleeping better if you do!

Raising Teen Girls – Interview

This podcast episode contains an interview with a man’s man who is raising a house full of girls. Stacy Ratliff is an independent video consultant, producer, and editor with over 25 years of experience. He has produced a ton of content in the hunting/fishing/shooting categories over the past two decades. Stacy wrote and produced the ESPN Ultimate NASCAR 100 Defining Moments, The Bassmaster Yearbook, Driven to Hunt and much more that has aired on ESPN, the Outdoor Channel, and the Sportsman Channel. He has done camera work on the National Finals Rodeo, music videos, commercials, and industrial films. You can see some of Stacy’s video work on his Vimeo page.

Stacy is they guy who took Dale Earnhardt Jr on his first hunt. Stacy worked with the three time NASCAR champion Tony Stewart on a show title Driven to Hunt. in that episode they were working with some kids through the Make A Wish Foundation. Stacy has also worked with NASCAR legend Dale Earnhardt as well as Bobby Labonte, Terry Labonte, Kevin Harvik, Martin Truex and many more.

Stacy has been married to Anne for 21 years. They have three teen girls ages 14, 16, and 18. They are key couple leaders in the Growing Families International parenting ministry.

Stacy has recently moved into the role of being an independent video consultant, producer, and editor. I am sure he would greatly appreciate any work you can send in his direction. You can connect with Stacy on LinkedIn.

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Episode 20 – Holiday Traditions

Gingerbread Train 2011

Gingerbread Train

I talked about Family Identity in Episode 12. It is important for dads to cultivate a sense of family identity. Getting your family together for a project like an annual gingerbread train or house is a great way to build family identity. Enter your creation into a competition. Have some fun with the project by creating some custom cars. Read more about the annual Osborne Family Gingerbread Train on Grill’n Time.

The Father’s Mandate – Where to learn more?

Best – Take a Growing Kids God’s Way class in a small group setting
Better – Go through the videos as a couple at home (GFI.org sale)
Good – Read On Becoming Childwise: Parenting Your Child from 3-7 Years

Find a Growing Kids God’s Way Class in your local area by visiting the GrowingKids.org web site. Use the “General Ministry or Curriculum” contact email address to ask about classes in your area.

Listen to the eight part series on The Father’s Mandate

1.  A father must cultivate a sense of family identity.
2.  A father must regularly demonstrate love to his wife.
3.  A father must understand and respect his child’s private world.
4.  A father must give his children the freedom to fail.
5.  A father must be the encourager of the family.
6.  A father must guard his tongue and his tone and learn to measure his response against the excitement on their faces.
7.  A father must routinely embrace his children.
8.  A father must build the trusting relationship on God’s Word, not on human wisdom.

Update on Caden – He broke his arm and the next week was hospitalized with pneumonia.

Tech Time:

Leo Laporte and Steve Gibson – Security Now Podcast

Which apps are safer? Apps from the Android market or the Apple App store?

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God’s Wisdom Above Man’s Wisdom

Fathers Mandate number 8.  A father must build the trusting relationships on God’s Word, not on human wisdom.

The Fathers Mandate Part 8 of 8
http://www.growingkids.org/leaders/gkgw-chapter-summaries/
Reference: Chapter 4 of Growing Kids God’s Way by Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo

Mr. Ezzo says that if you don’t get this then everything else in the other mandates does not matter.

From Psalm 118:8 (TLB) “It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.”

Who is God and what does He mean to you and your family?

Please remember that much more is caught than taught.

“Adapted from a recent online discussion.
New dad wonders how to juggle parenting with football season
Football season!: How much is my child going to hate me as he grows up with me watching three football games in a row on Sundays, and another on Monday nights? (I do chores during breaks, I swear, but I’ve never had a baby or child to care for during football season before.)” Source Tampabay.com

This issue of building relationships with your children based on God’s word is not about choosing church over sports on Sunday.  It is about having the ways of God “on your hearts. Impressing them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the street, when you lie down and when you get up.” from Deuteronomy 6: 6-9 New International Version (NIV)

Read God’s word in the Bible for yourself. That is how you will be able to determine what God’s wisdom is verses what other people around you say.

Reading Plans


By the numbers

The Bible has 66 Books made up of 1189 Chapters. To read the Bible in a year you will read on average:
99 Chapters in a month
5.5 Books per month
3.26 Chapters per dayYou can read the entire Bible from cover to cover in less than 100 hours.

Here are some audio Bibles: (aff)

The Word of Promise: Complete Audio BibleThe Complete Audio Holy Bible: King James Version

Why read? To get a better understanding of who God is and what He means to you and your family.

Proverbs 14:12 New King James Version (NKJV)

12 There is a way that seems right to a man,
But its end is the way of death.

How to become a Christian:

1 John 1:9

New King James Version (NKJV)
9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Ephesians 2:8-9

New Living Translation (NLT)
8 God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. 9 Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.

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Dads: HUG YOUR KIDS!

The Fathers Mandate Part 7 of 8

From Growing Kids God’s Way by Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo
Scroll down to the reference for Chapter 4

Feedback: Andy from Better Dad Podcast says thanks!

Mandate number 7.  A father must routinely embrace his children.

Sherry and I meet in a hugging community. We meet through Phi Theta Kappa International Honor Society. Some folks shake hands, but PTK members HUG!

Mom’s touch provides kids with a feeling of comfort and love. Dad’s hugs

Mr. Ezzo warns that if parents, especially dads, don’t embrace their kids, they will eventually seek it from someone else. And they will find the affection they want and you will likely not like it.

Don’t let you daughter’s preadolescence physical changes cause you to treat her any different. She is the same person on the inside. She needs to know her dad loves her as she goes through these changes.

Hug your kids!

Tech Time

Which anti-virus should you use on your Android phone?

Facebook social engineering.

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!

Podcast Episode 16 – Google Security Tips

The Fathers Mandate Part 5 of 8

From Growing Kids God’s Way
Scroll down to the reference for Chapter 4

Happy Birthday Caden
 

Mandate number 5.  A father must be the encourager of the family.

Not just encouraging words but a spirit of encouragement.

Leave notes for your kids in their lunch boxes.

Write a letter. Tell you wife to remind you about this one. Scapbooks!

Consider having dad sign Christmas cards and birthday cards.

Give your kids the opportunity to prove themselves trustworthy.
My dad gave me the freedom to drive my little sister around our farm in the old Ford Fairlane. I talked about this in my Howto Train Your Kids to use the Internet Safely.

9 year old driving 64 Ford Fairlane
Tech Time 

http://www.google.com/goodtoknow/

  1. Strong Passwords – change them
  2. Enable two step verification
  3. Always PATCH your operating systems, browsers, and applications
  4. Be aware of suspect web sites – social engineering
  5. Check for antivirus and malware – Use well know products and keep them current

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!


Podcast Episode 15 – Give Your Child the Freedom to Fail

The Fathers Mandate Part 4 of 8
From Growing Kids God’s Way
Scroll down to the reference for Chapter 4

The Fathers Mandate Part 4 of 8
http://www.growingkids.org/leaders/gkgw-chapter-summaries/
Scroll down to the reference for Chapter 4

4.  A father must give his children the freedom to fail.

– Your children need to freedom to fail…in front of Dad.
– So many adults are haunted by the fact that they feel like they could never live up to -dad’s expectations.
– Achievement and relationships are areas that your child will experience failure
– Your job is to help them find the blessings

I have already covered the following:
1.  A father must cultivate a sense of family identity.
2.  A father must regularly demonstrate love to his wife.
3.  A father must understand and respect his child’s private world.

In the coming weeks I will share ideas to help dads fulfill the remaining mandates
5.  A father must be the encourager of the family.
6.  A father must guard his tongue and his tone and learn to measure his response against the excitement on their faces.
7.  A father must routinely embrace his children.
8.  A father must build the trusting relationship on God’s Word, not on human wisdom.

Tech Time

iPhone  or Droid for your children?

The iPhone has some pretty good security features to limit and control access. See security settings that I recommend on the iPhone, iPad, and iPod Touch.

FEEDBACK:

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!

 

Podcast Episode 14 – Smart Phone Security Concerns

The Fathers Mandate Part 3 of 8
From Growing Kids God’s Way
Scroll down to the reference for Chapter 4

3.  A father must understand and respect his child’s private world.

Public World – What people see and hear when you are out and about in a public setting. The things that can be seen by strangers on the street.
Personal World – The world where your closest friends and family commonly see and hear things you that are never shown in public.
Private World – This is on the inside. People have to be invited in to see what is in here.

Open window phenomenon – Its when your child invites you into their private world. It can come when walking or at bedtime. Be careful because you never know when the open window will come.

I have already covered the following:
1.  A father must cultivate a sense of family identity.

Riley’s birthday trip

2.  A father must regularly demonstrate love to his wife.

In the coming weeks I will share ideas to help dads fulfill the remaining mandates
4.  A father must give his children the freedom to fail.
5.  A father must be the encourager of the family.
6.  A father must guard his tongue and his tone and learn to measure his response against the excitement on their faces.
7.  A father must routinely embrace his children.
8.  A father must build the trusting relationship on God’s Word, not on human wisdom.

Tech Time

iPhone 4s

Pretty much looks the same on the outside, but on the inside:
Duel processor promises to give better performance
Two Antennas for better reception
Upgraded Camera to 8 megapixels with improved optics including an added lense
Voice activated search and response from Siri

“The Defense IA Security Accreditation Working Group (DSAWG), which is the DoD approval body for Security Technical Implementation Guides (STIGs), determined that iOS devices should not be deployed in the DoD at this time due to unmitigated iOS device security risks. Therefore the DSAWG directed the draft iPhone/iPad STIG be removed from the IASE web site.” Source

Cellphones will become a way to attack otherwise protected devices: report

  1. Attached to USB for charging and data transfer – moving pictures from your phone to your PC or Mac
  2. They act just like Thumb drives Remember Stuxnet?  The attack on Iranian nuclear facilities.
  3. Small keyboard make fro more mistakes typing. How many times have you had to apologize for an auto correction done by your phone?
  4. Browsers are less sophisticated and do not give indications of insecure content.

Convenience comes at a price. The easier it is for the user to do the wrong thing, the easier it is for hackers slip into you phone and then into your network at home or in the office.

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!

Podcast Episode 13 – GKGW Fathers Mandate 2 – Regularly Demonstrate Love to your Wife

The Fathers Mandate Part 2 of 8
Based on Chapter 4 from Growing Kids God’s Way 

1.  A father must cultivate a sense of family identity. (Review)

– Be proud of your family – as Mr Ezzo said be the cheer leader (We are the Osbornes and we…) Rise above the level of mediocrity!

I added a couple of blog posts this week. One related to Cub Scout activities this past weekend. Our oldest two boys got to shoot BB Guns, Bow and Arrows, and Sling Shots.

Make sure your activities are in line with your family goals and values. Do you have them written down? Are your goals Simple, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, TRUTH based?
What education method makes your family unique: Public, private or home school?

2.  A father must regularly demonstrate love to his wife.

Mr. Ezzo says, “If you really love your children then give them the gift of confidence and security. Show them how much you love their mom.”

In Episode 4 I talked about the importance of Dating and Couch Time.

In Episode 7 I talked about the need for dads to take your wife out of her role as a mom and put her back in her role as a wife. To do this you need to elarn your wife’s love language. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman 

In the coming weeks I will share ideas to help dads fulfill the remaining mandates
3.  A father must understand and respect his child’s private world.
12 minutes
4.  A father must give his children the freedom to fail.
5.  A father must be the encourager of the family.
6.  A father must guard his tongue and his tone and learn to measure his response against the excitement on their faces.
7.  A father must routinely embrace his children.
8.  A father must build the trusting relationship on God’s Word, not on human wisdom.

Tech Time

Microsoft Intelligence Report

The PDF report can be found in the download section ont he right side of the page.

An in-depth perspective on software vulnerabilities and exploits, malicious code threats, and potentially unwanted software in the first half of 2011.

45% – User Interaction Required
26% – Autorun of USB or network files

What you can do.

  1. Be smart.
  2. Implement strong passwords and Patch your systems. There are patches for your OS, Browsers (IE, FireFox, Safari, Chrome) Aplciaitons (Adobe flash, reader, etc), iTunes, Qiucktime, MS Office.

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!

 

Podcast Episode 12 – GKGW Fathers Mandate 1 – Cultivate a Sense of Family Idenity

Part 1 of an 8 part series on how I implement the Fathers Mandate from chapter 4 of the Growing Kids God’s Way (GKGW) parenting series by Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo. This episode provides a short click from GKGW session four where Mr. Ezzo introduces the first mandate.

CNN Opinion article Why Men are in Trouble by William J Bennett
“Today, 18-to- 34-year-old men spend more time playing video games a day than 12-to- 17-year-old boys.” via Shawn Wood

Courageous Movie opened Friday September 30th. This awesome movie is a great challenge for dayd, Courageous came in number one in the box office for new releases last weekend.

Parenting and Relationships

The Father’s Mandate – How I cultivate a sense of family identity.

  • Special family activities Gingerbread train
  • Other cooking activities like 4 year old biscuits
  • Let them help you with tasks around the house even if it slows you down
  • Create memories with special activities and trips (NC apple picking, family camping, fishing, geocaching)
  • Be the spiritual leader by praying and leading devotionals with the family – As kids get older let them lead portions of the devotional time
  • Take your child shopping or on errands
  • Be proud of your family – as Mr Ezzo said be the cheer leader (We are the Osbornes and we…) Rise above the level of mediocrity!
  • Holidays (we work very hard to tell our kids the truth. We do not lie about Santa, the tooth fairy, or the Easter bunny.) Read about how Halloween is different in our family.

Tech Time

Facebook Share “feature”

My friend, we will call him John, shares a photo on his wall. He shared it via the “share” button from his friend Sue who shared it from her “Wall Photos” album. I am only friends with John and I am not friends with Sue on Facebook. BUT, now that my friend John has shared a photo from Sue, I can not click on that photo and then cycle through all of the Wall photos that Sue has ever shared….and get this…I can even comment on those photos. Sue does not know me and I do not know Sue but here I am leaving comments on Sue’s wall.

The reverse is true. Based on the default settings in Facebook…Once you share a photo it can be shared by any one of your friends and their friends can then share it and so on and so forth. And all of the friends of all of the people who have shared the photo now have access to view and write comments on ALL of the photos in the album that contains the one photo that your friend shared.

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Technology Safety is more about Behavior than the Technology!